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| Do you really think I'm a good idea? |
Bacon wrapped water chestnuts.
Bacon shrimp.
Bacon salt. (Amazingly good on pancakes.)
Bacon chocolate.
Bacon shake. (Oh yeah. I'm sure it existed before me, but I made Denny's during their Baconalia phase take the bacon maple sundae they were offering, add more bacon and blend it. Damn that was some good clogged artery fun, let me tell you!)
The bacon toothpicks were not so great but aside from not tasting anything like bacon, they at least served a purpose with... ya know... being toothpicks.
And this is what happened to the bacon soda.
Rocket Fizz Soda Pop & Candy Shop opened up recently near where I live. They sell various candies and sugary treats. When looking at their website, one of the first things I noticed were the sodas. Being a fan of Jones Soda, I smiled at flavors such as Blue Cream and Watermelon, but when I saw the word "bacon", my grin got wider, and I decided that this place was some place I needed to check out.
So I bought four sodas that night (Valentine's Day Eve), and brought them home - immediately popping open the bacon one. Now the dude at the shop said it tasted like cooked crisp bacon as well as smelled like bacon.
I need to have a chat with that dude's taste buds.
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| Lester! Why couldn't you make it taste better? Damn you! |
I first smelled the cap which smelled like... well... a metal bottle cap. Then placing my nose over the open bottle, I inhaled deeply and smelled... something that did not smell like bacon to me. I can't really describe what it smelled like, but I'm pretty sure it could be used to thin paint or make hydrochloric acid scream bloody murder.
Okay, perhaps that was an exaggeration, but no... it did NOT smell of bacon. (Strike one to the dude at the shop.)
I then tipped the bottle to my lips (I may have even said a silent prayer of some kind), took a gulp and swallowed.
And then I made a bad face.
Now it's not like I shook a baby that just ate and tilted its mouth toward mine and waited.
No... it was still bad in any case.
Amazing how carbonated water, sugar, citric acid, sodium benzoate (preservative), caramel color, natural color and red 40 can make your mouth ask you the question "Don't you love me anymore?" followed by "What did I do?"
There's not much in the way of nutritional facts since the label looks more comedic than informative. In tiny print on the side, it says the serving size is 12 oz (which means one good thing - that I was drinking for one again). The bottle of bacon icky soda is 170 calories and (this makes me giggle a little) "not a significant source of calories from fat, saturated fat, cholesterol, dietary fiber, Vitamin A and C, Calcium and Iron".
Really? Who in their right mind is going to a GNC and asking for this stuff?
Joe Moron: Excuse me. I'm feeling a little plugged up. Do you have any Bacon Soda? I hear it's a good source of dietary fiber!
Now here's the thing. I voluntarily bought this drink, and knowing they all can't be winners, I will finish the damn thing. In all honesty, I drank about half or a little more than that the night I bought it, and I left it on my dresser while I went out running errands and such and have just picked it up again, and I could joke that it got flat and that it tastes better that way, but no.
It tastes the SAME!!!
I've got about three fingers left in the bottle so if you'll excuse me?
(bottle empty)
"Made in the USA Pure Cane Sugar"... my ASS!!!
Yeccch!
Would I ever try this again? No. The flavor alone isn't enough to make me come back screaming for more. Perhaps if alcohol were added to make it into an interesting cocktail of some kind, perhaps... but no. Didn't like it enough to drink it solo.
Intellectual property of and bottled by the:
Rocket Fizz Soda Pop and Candy Shops, LLC
PO Box 3663
Camarillo, CA 93011
http://rocketfizz.com/
