Fine Bacon Chocolates

My family is so crafty, yo!

My birthday is so close to Thanksgiving that I usually wait to celebrate it with my family when I go home for the holiday.

Ahhh yes.  Turkey, cake and ice cream...

... And chocolate with bacon in it?

Since my niece is DA BOMB, I went to see her immediately to get a good dose of some cutie pie cuddles and sweet adoring kisses.

When I got there, my brother and his family presented me with birthday presents (which I never really expect, but they are always nice to get).  Of my presents, I was surprised to receive an elite box of bacon chocolates.

I had never seen chocolates like this before.

Were they from Paris, France?  Venice, Italy?  Madrid, Spain?

No.  I was surprised to see they came from Fresno, CA.

Well spank my ass and make me say "mama"!

The cocoa beans were imported from Spain, but other than that, the yumscious chocolate treats were made in good ol' Fresno.  (Color me surprised.)

Forever to live on my hips and thighs.

Being a fan of chocolate, bacon, and... well... chocolate AND bacon, I unwrapped the box and dove right in.

Opening the box was reminiscent of the scene from Pulp Fiction whenever anyone opened up the infamous suitcase.  A brilliant heavenly glow shined upon my face, warming my soul and almost bringing a tear to my eye.

I think I even heard a chorus of angels singing the chocolates praises.

Inside I found delectable cubes and hearts of pure love wrapped in tissue papers that were (no doubt) hand-crafted and flown in from Brazil, each paper carefully selected to hug the pure decadent gluttony of each scrumptious morsel.

At present, I am trying to use restraint and not devour them all in one sitting.  (And trust me, I can do it.  Consider it one of my super powers.)

• Serving size: the whole frakkin box
• Calories per serving: delicious
• Calories from fat: even more deliciousness
• Allergy advisory: if you're allergic to yummy things, don't eat this
• Warning: May contain joy and later produce ridiculously silly grins followed by various sighs of contentment.  Also may be addictive.  Proceed with caution.

Would I ever try this again?  HELLS YEAH!!!  People, come on now!  It's CHOCOLATE and BACON!!!  If my brother and niece make these tasty treats for me again, who the frak am I to say no? 

Exclusively distributed by:
My brother and my niece (with love)

Manufactured by:
My brother and my niece (with love)  

everyone says GOOD GOOD EAT - GGE BBQ cube

Why are you pouting, little girl on package?

Last week Friday my friend Lailani had a Harajuku-themed birthday party to ring in her 32 years on this planet.

In keeping with the theme (which is Asian - specifically Japanese), there were tons of Asian nom-noms to nosh on.  There was sushi, fried calamari, rice, katsu chicken... as well as some other crispy snacks like wasabi peas and some Oriental trail mix type stuff.

There were also several bags of Japanese ramen noodle wheat crackers that looked interesting.

The brand: everyone says GOOD GOOD EAT.

Yeah.  You read that right.  Just look to the pic to the left.

Oh you kooky Japanese and your weird names for stuff.

Anyway - there were leftovers so the birthday girl doled out food stuffs to people in true Filipino mama fashion.  (You should see the piece of cake I was sent home.  I think it was responsible for sinking the Titanic.)  One of the snacks I took home was a "good good eat" bag of BBQ ramen crackers.

Ahhh, ramen.  You versatile food you.  Aside from your soupy goodness, I've also had you in salads.  Quite tasty.

Now the bag *I* took home looked different than the pic I found whilst Google'ing.  (Don't worry.  I wore protection.  *wink*)  On my bag, there was a word bubble near the girl's head which had her saying, "GGE BBQ cube".

visual cube example, yo!

I have no idea WTFrak "GGE" stands for (and maybe I don't want to), but let us forget that for the moment and discuss the whole "cube" thing, shall we?  I mean, we all know what a cube is: a solid bounded by six equal squares, the angle between any two adjacent faces being a right angle.

Thanks dictionary.com.

So when I reached into the bag I expected to find a bunch of square pieces of ramen crunchy goodness.  Things similar to the size of a bouillon or sugar cube.

Did I find that?  No.

What did I find?  (see below)

Do these look like cubes to you?

Look.  Go ahead.  Look.  Tell me what you see.

Wanna know what I see?

I see round mini pucks of dried noodles.

During the party while chilling near the snack tables, a group of us tried the various ramen crackers, and at least once we drew a cracker from the bag and held it like Hamlet with Yorick's skull and posed the question with a quirked eyebrow, "These are cubes?"

nerd cube reference just for me

Regardless of it's lack of cube shapeyness, the crackers themselves were rather tasty.  Depending on your heat tolerance, the spices that make up the BBQ flavor can be a bit strong for the weaksauce people or bland for those that love the burn.  In either case, the snack is still salty but yummy and kind of addicting if you like that sort of thing.  (Which I do!)

I was surprised to see the list of ingredients was so short: wheat flour, potato starch, soy sauce (soybean, salt), yeast powder, palm oil, garlic, white pepper, black pepper, chili powder. 

And let's not forget the allergy information while we're at it: contains wheat, soybean.

The front of the bag claims "no preservatives" and "no artificial flavors" as well as being a product of Taiwan.  The nutrition facts on the back state the serving size is 1.05 oz (30 g).  With the bag being 4.5 oz (115 g), that leaves the snacker with a little over four servings.  Since the bag was part of the leftovers, I'm guessing I ate about two which at the rate of 160 calories per serving, I ate over 300.

Whoo-doggie!  Don't I feel piggish!  LOL!

Would I ever try this again?  Sure I would.  I'm all about salty snacks.  This also makes for good PMS food.  Curious as to how many other flavors there are as well.

Exclusively distributed by:
NISHIMOTO TRADING CO., LTF
Santa Fe Springs, CA 90670-6336

Manufactured by:
WEI LIH FOOD INDUSTRIAL CO., LTD
No. 465, Yuanji Road, Sec. 3, Tienchung, Changua, Taiwan